


Enough

by Bellaledrid



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Post-Season/Series 05 Finale, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:28:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25541356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bellaledrid/pseuds/Bellaledrid
Summary: Post Season 5 finale. Leviathan is gone. Lena now has to deal with everything that happened with her brother and her tentative new friendship with Kara.As the Superfriends push her away, despite her help, will Lena's love for Kara be enough to make her stay or will those feelings drive them apart?TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!! Please read tags!
Comments: 3
Kudos: 44





	Enough

Lena headed straight back to her penthouse after they finished defeating Leviathan. The others were all going to the tower to celebrate their victory, but Lena didn’t join them. Sure, her and Kara had one slightly positive conversation, but she wasn’t eager to sit and make small talk with people who had called her a villain days earlier. 

She stepped through her front door and leant back against it as it closed. Come to think of it, she hadn’t actually been invited to go with them. Just vague nods of unwilling appreciation for her help. 'What do you expect?' Lena’s inner voice spat at her, 'You’re just another Luthor to them. You always will be.' The voice sounded a lot like her brother’s. Lena winced at the memory of her brother and their last interaction.

Alcohol. Lena needed alcohol if her mind was going to attempt to process everything that had happened over the last couple of days. Crossing the room to her liquor cabinet, she poured herself a large glass of whiskey. Downing it in one go, she refilled it before heading to her couch. Lena’s mind drew her back to her brother. The brother she had once loved. The brother who she had hoped against all hope had changed. The brother who had stood there and screamed in her face. Screamed that he had put his own goals aside and implied she should be grateful for it. Please, when had Lex ever done anything that wasn’t for himself.

God, she hated that she had allowed herself to believe he cared. That she was anything other than a pawn in his latest scheme. 'They’ll never trust you. Not after everything you’ve done. One mistake and look at how they treated you. They’ll never love you.' Lex’s voice continued to echo in her head. 'She’ll never love you.'

Kara. Supergirl.

It all came back to Kara. A woman she wanted to hate so badly. She wanted to hate her for all the lies. The friendship they had had. The friendship that lie had ruined. Was any of it real? Was it ever anything more than a way to keep an eye on the last free Luthor? Kara had denied it, of course she had. But could Lena trust that wasn’t another lie?

Why did she have to be Supergirl? Why couldn’t she just have been Kara? Bubbly, clumsy, kind-hearted Kara Danvers. Lena groaned that the mess that was her life, suddenly regretting not bringing the bottle of whiskey with her. She briefly debated between alcohol and staying relaxed on the couch. Unsurprisingly, at least to Lena, alcohol won out. However, two glasses of whiskey later, she still couldn’t get Kara off her mind. She had broken things off with James because of Kara. Yes, she had other valid reasons to do so, but the main factor was Kara. A woman who had made her feel cared about, loved for the first time since she had become a Luthor. Kara, who would never love her the way Lena loved Kara.

Abandoning her bottle of whiskey in front of her, Lena stumbled towards her bedroom in a loose attempt at getting ready for bed. If alcohol wasn’t going to make her feel better, maybe sleep would. Though she doubted it. Standing in her bathroom her eyes fell on a bottle of sleeping pills. Unopened. Lena had filled the prescription her doctor had given her, but never used it. She was a Luthor, she didn’t need help with anything. Still, one couldn’t hurt. Might even help.

'Or you could take them all.' - The voice was back. Lex.

'The world would be better off without you.' - This time it sounded like Lillian.

'We don’t need you.' – Kara’s voice joined in.

'None of this would have happened if you hadn’t sided with Lex.' – Alex.

'Don’t be naïve, sis.'

'My sister could have died because of you.'

'You were never really a Luthor.'

'The whole world could have died.'

'Luthors don’t make mistakes.'

'The only mistake a Luthor ever made was having you.'

'This is all your fault.'

'Just end it.'

“Enough.” Lena sobbed. Tears were flowing down her face. Tears she hadn’t even realised she was crying. A shaking hand picked up the bottle and tipped one pill out.

Then another.

And another.

Raising her hand, she swallowed all three.

And then another three.

And another.

Her hands never stopped shaking. The tears never stopped falling. And she never stopped taking them. Until the bottle was empty.

Staggering towards her bed, she sank to her knees before her bedside table; eyes on the notepad she always left there. Scrawling out a note, she hoisted herself onto the bed and closed her eyes. She closed her eyes and thought of Kara. Of the life she would have. A life better without Lena in it to screw everything up. And then she thought of the life that might have been. A life where they were happy; together. A life without the betrayals and lies, the heartbreak and loss. The life she had always wished for and would never have.

And that was how Kara found her, having sensed Lena’s irregular heartbeat and flown over to check on her; lying atop her purple, silk covers and clutching a note with two words in her hand.

'I’m sorry.'

**Author's Note:**

> This got a bit darker than I was anticipating. Oops.
> 
> Might add a second chapter to this later, but for now this is it.


End file.
